Online Fame | A 'blog written by Chris Rhee

I finally got around to updating the about page of this website (even though all it took was to add one more number to my age). My reason for not updating this website for over two weeks: A massive birthday party that didn’t end until five minutes ago.

Actually, I had no birthday party. I didn’t go out and chain smoke or stroll around strip club chains. I don’t really like to acknowledge my birthday (to people I’m not friends with, anyway). Luckily, I only had one class on my birthday and I’m at a new school, so no one had any idea. A bunch of people who don’t know me singing Happy Birthday and pausing where they have to say my name is a situation I’d like to avoid.

I was planning on staying home and devising a plan C for world domination, but my girlfriend left behind Los Angeles and made a death-defying air-trip to my house and surprised me.

People were asking what I wanted for my birthday and I would always say, “I don’t know”. Annie didn’t have to ask, she knew that I just wanted to see her.

Note: To make up for this softcore post, my next one will be about killing people. Come back, soon, suckas.

KFC does not use mutated chickens. I have to start with that because everyone who gets their facts from other friends they know who “swears they saw it on tv” seems to think that KFC has started manufacturing 10 breasted chickens that have laser beams on their heads.

But what can you expect when the most valuable thing people learn in high school is to believe what other people your age tell you is true? Ba-zing!

I can always count on two actors to choose to act in movies that I like: Kevin Spacey and Denzel Washington. I was skeptical about the last two movies I saw them in (Out of Time and The Life of David Gale), but they both turned out to be very enjoyable movies. Those are two actors who don’t dissapoint.

Two actors who used to be safe bets for me where Samuel L. Jackson and Bruce Willis. But Samuel L. Jackson has been doing some weird stuff lately (XXX, Star Wars, Formula 51). And Bruce Willis doesn’t seem to be picking the kinds of scripts he used to choose to act in either.

But any movie with a combination of these four actors is a movie you can’t miss: Die Hard 3, The Negotiator, The Siege, etc.

“Safe bet actors” are good for when you’re in a rental store and you’re wondering what to watch. Otherwise you just look foolish for standing in Blockbuster for thirty minutes. And even more foolish when you eventually walk out with nothing in your hands and you have to try to play it off with the cashier which you HAVE to walk by to leave…

If anyone can help me find any of the following types of music, please let me know:

• Any group with music like E.S. Posthumus or Kronos Quartet. They both seem to be popular in the movie industry for soundtracks, movie scores, and music for trailers. I’m currently using them as studying music for when I read or write.
• Rap battles (freestyles or written). Lots of word play, please, I’m not looking for the below-average after school special type of battles (unless your school happens to have some talented emcees). Often, they have some good battles on the radio, but I don’t have any recordings or anything. I just like to listen to the word play and rhymes.
• Any hip-hop/rap songs that have a good beat/flow/rhyme— the whole package— by unsigned or underground rappers. This is mainly for a new section on an old website that I want to start up, but also for my own listening pleasure.

Thanks to anyone who can help out.

I went out to lunch today and was asked what we’ve all been asked before at a restaurant: “Did you save any room for dessert?”. In my experience, people usually don’t have much of an appetite for dessert after eating the entree (and if they do, then they complain about the portions of food rather than paying for more).

So my solution for all restaurant owners is to have your waiters ask the customer if they want dessert when they’re ordering their appetizers/entree. It’ll be just like the whole eat-before-you-buy-groceries thing: they’ll be hungry, so many people will order more than they can eat.

If any restaurants see that their dessert purchases raise by 50% or something because of this, send some complimentary sugar-filled food my way.